Recently, a lovely lady asked me two questions:
- How would you define mindfulness to someone who has never heard of it?
- What’s one thing you can do to stay mindful throughout the day?
That lovely lady was Dr. Rahat Sayyad of the Doctor Mommy Speaks podcast. You can listen to our conversation about mindfulness here.
I’d like to share my answers with you, but first, let me ask YOU a question:
Do you ever find that while doing a task, your mind is elsewhere?
Maybe you’re physically making your bed, changing a diaper, or driving, but your mind is actually replaying a comment your boss made this morning.
Or imagining the moment your partner walks through the door with dinner. (Pizza? Chinese?)
Or maybe that new Black Keys song is stuck in your head…one thing leads to another…and suddenly an entire rock concert is happening between your two ears.
This happens all the time. To all of us. Constantly. You can so easily get carried away with one random thought that occurs to you.
“Did I leave the stove on? I wonder what would happen if I did. Would the house burn down? How much smoke would it take to alert the smoke detector? When’s the last time I changed the batteries in the smoke detector? I need to change the batteries in the smoke detector! How long would it take the fire department to get here? If I could only take one thing with me as I left, what would it be? Jeez, I should really prepare for this in case it actually happens. Oh my god, it’s 6 o’clock, I have to feed the dog!”
Your mind ceaselessly drones on and on unless you make a conscious effort to interrupt it. Unless you bring yourself back to the present moment.
That’s what mindfulness is. Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your wandering mind back to the present, over and over. It’s being aware of all those crazy, irrelevant thoughts, letting them go, and being in the here and now.
And I mean really be present. With all of your five senses. When you truly focus your attention on the task at hand, you’ll be amazed at the amount of delicious detail the present moment holds. Details that you would otherwise overlook. Details that bring your happiness, satisfaction, and fulfillment from a “meh” to a “hell yeah!”
One way you can really easily bring yourself back to the present is by rubbing the tip of your thumb and pointer finger together. (Thank you, dear Leah, for the tip!)
Sounds silly. I get it. Humor me and try it. Do it now for a few seconds. And really, really focus on the sensation of your fingers against one another. Closing your eyes will help.
What do you feel? A bit of warmth from the friction? The ridges of your fingerprints? A callous or two? Play around with the speed and direction of the movement. Do you feel a difference? How?
This, my friends, is being mindful. This is focusing your attention on the task at hand. This is relishing in the beautiful gift of the present moment.
Isn’t it magical?
Imagine how much you’ve been missing out on by playing concerts in your head!
When you find yourself getting caught in a web of thoughts, use this quick trick to reorient yourself to the present moment. The physical sensation will help to snap yourself back to reality.
I’d be remiss not to mention that being mindful is difficult to do, which is why it’s called a practice. It’s difficult to do because you’re not aware that these thoughts are occurring.
Your mind is just blabbing on, and you usually go along with what your mind says, because, it’s your mind after all!
The trick is, you can choose to not listen to, identify with, or run away with the stories your babbling mind writes.
With time and intention, you will be able to spot and interrupt your mind’s monologues and bring yourself back to the here and now. Over time, those thoughts won’t have such a strong hold on you. Over time, you’ll be able to create distance between you and those thoughts.
That is when you will find a sense of calm, clarity, and connection.
In the meantime, keep rubbing those two fingers together.
